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Is Fearlessness a Myth? Why Running From Fear is Keeping You Stuck

We’ve all heard it: “Be fearless!” It’s splashed across Instagram, whispered by well-meaning friends, and echoed in every self-help book on the shelf. The message seems simple enough: fear is bad, and we need to get rid of it if we want to achieve our goals. But is that really true? Is there even such a thing as being completely fearless?


Let’s be honest, most of us are in a constant tug-of-war with fear. We avoid it like the plague, sidestep it at every turn, and beat ourselves up if it creeps in. We tell ourselves we’re weak for feeling it, or worse, we avoid the very things we want to do because we’re afraid of failing, looking ridiculous, or just not being good enough.


But here’s the thing—what if fearlessness isn’t the goal? And what if running from fear is actually what’s keeping you stuck?


Fear is Hardwired—And That's Okay

First, let’s debunk this whole idea of fearlessness. Fear is a basic human emotion, deeply ingrained in our DNA. Our ancestors needed fear to survive. It kept them from wandering too close to predators or making reckless choices. It’s the reason we’re still here today. So, why are we so desperate to outrun it now?


The truth is, fear doesn’t disappear just because we want it to. Fear of rejection, failure, or uncertainty might not be life-threatening, but our brain responds as if it is. We’re wired to be cautious, to protect ourselves from pain, disappointment, and shame. And that’s okay.


Instead of trying to erase fear, we need to rethink how we see it.


As Eleanor Roosevelt wisely said, “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.” What if facing fear, rather than avoiding it, is exactly how we grow?


Fear Is Not the Enemy—It’s a Signal

Fear is often painted as the villain, but what if it's more of a signal—a sign that something meaningful is happening? Maybe we’re on the edge of growth. Maybe it’s showing us where we need to step up, where we need to go rather than retreat.


Fear means we care. It means we’re about to do something outside our comfort zone, and that’s where the magic happens. Running from fear keeps us in the same safe little box, but nothing great ever happens in the box, does it?


Why Are We Always Running?

Think about it: how many times have you avoided an opportunity or stayed quiet in a meeting because of fear? Fear is like that embarrassing old friend you don’t want anyone to know about. But the more you push it away, the more power it has.


Running from fear is like trying to escape our shadow—it’s always there, looming larger the faster we try to flee. So why do we do it? Simple: society tells us fear is weak. We’ve built this whole narrative around fearlessness being the only way to be successful. But trying to run from fear makes you afraid of being afraid, and it’s a vicious cycle.


What If We Stopped Running?

Instead of running from fear, what if we faced it? Fear doesn’t need to be eliminated; it needs to be acknowledged. The next time we feel fear creeping in, let's don’t push it away. Lean in, question it. “Why am I afraid of this? What’s the worst that could happen?” When we look fear straight in the eye, it loses its power.


And here's a little secret: even the most successful people, the ones who seem fearless, still feel fear. The difference is, they don’t let it stop them.


Fear Is a Compass

If fear is signaling something important, what would happen if we started following it instead of avoiding it? That fear of public speaking, of launching that business, or of having a difficult conversation? It’s often a sign that those are exactly the things we need to do. Fear is pointing us toward the edge of our comfort zone—where all the good stuff happens.


For those who operate from the lens of Scripture, I know what you are thinking: "God said, 'Do not be afraid.'" And you are right; that’s repeated in Scripture often. But when you go to the original text, you’ll discover the implication is, "Don’t let fear get in the way of what I’m doing."


So, no, fearlessness isn’t the goal. The goal is to stop letting fear hold us hostage. Instead of running from it, start running toward it. Face it. Use it as fuel. Because the moment we stop seeing fear as the enemy is the moment it stops controlling our life.


Embrace Fear

Fear doesn’t need to be conquered—it needs to be embraced. Every time we feel it, it’s an opportunity to grow, to learn, to push our boundaries. And isn’t that what we’re all here to do? Life isn’t about eliminating fear; it’s about having the courage to move forward in spite of it.


So, stop running. Acknowledge your fear. Make it your companion, not your captor. Fear is part of the journey—and it just might be the compass pointing you toward the life you really want.


What fear have you been running from? What would change if you faced it head-on?

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